All of our assessments are housed in our IAS so if you are scheduled to take an assessment or would like to view your results you can find it all here. You can access your assessments and profilehere
Our leadership development lab delivers the latest content created by Complete Coherence to help embed development deeper within an organisation. You can access your contenthere
Your journey to brilliance can begin today. Buy selected Complete Coherence assessments, audio programmes and coaching direct.Buy Now
Twenty years ago the accumulation of skills, knowledge and experience (‘horizontal development’) was sufficient for business success. Today, it’s not. 4D Leadership – Competitive Advantage Through Vertical Leadership Development, offers a new approach of ‘vertical development’.See Other Books
I usually take one of two approaches to conflict – accommodation or avoidance. Those are the approaches with which I feel most comfortable. But a recent experience (and some helpful coaching) enabled me to put into practice a new approach to conflict management – an assertive approach.
Someone was behaving aggressively towards me. Instead of avoiding or accommodating the situation, I decided to step forward and match his energy. Admittedly, when I did that, it didn’t really feel like me so I didn’t exactly enjoy it. It put me outside of my comfort zone, but as time has gone on the experience has made me feel more empowered. When step back from the experience and view things with some clarity, I can see that I was right to take a stand on this issue and not to avoid confrontation.
The right way to take an assertive approach to conflict management is to be firm in your response and not allow yourself to be bullied. It is not about shouting back at the person shouting at you, but being calmly firm.
What enabled me to take this new approach to conflict management was not just understanding the different theory of the different approaches to conflict, it was about learning to manage my own emotional state in that moment of deciding to respond in a different way. Without emotional control I couldn’t have taken a different approach. I would either have given in or been as aggressive as he was.
I’ll admit that before I engaged with this aggressor, I did shout around the office for a bit – I got rid of the energy that had come from his aggression towards me. After that, I was able to get my breathing under control and choose a more controlled response and that felt good. It’s not about responding in the heat of the moment, but achieving coherence and then choosing how you want to deal with the confrontation.
What is your approach to dealing with conflict? Please submit a comment below.